Angel M. Flener, LE
June 18, 2024

“Success is a journey, not a destination”. It's a revolving path paved with challenges, opportunities, and lots of growth. However, on this journey, many of us find ourselves facing walls that can seem hard to get over. These walls, often self-constructed, prevent us from reaching our full potential. Understanding and breaking down these barriers is crucial for personal and professional success.

Let’s take a second to explore how we build these walls and how we can dismantle them to achieve our goals:

The Walls of Self-Doubt and Fear

I have found through my own coaching sessions that one of the most significant barriers to success is self-doubt. This inner voice may occasionally tell us we are “not good enough”, smart enough, or capable enough to achieve our dreams. It’s a wall built from what we are taught have been past failures, criticisms, and the fear of the unknown. When we listen to this voice, we limit ourselves… and our potential.

Breaking Down the Wall:

1. Acknowledge Your Achievements: Reflect on past successes, no matter how small. This will help build confidence and remind you of your capabilities.
2. Challenge Negative Thoughts: Whenever a negative thought arises, question its validity. Replace it with positive affirmations and realistic perspectives.
3. Take Small Steps: Break your goals into smaller, manageable tasks. Each small victory will help to build confidence and reduce self-doubt.

The Wall of Procrastination

Procrastination is another wall that many of us build. Sometimes we build it unconsciously. It’s the act of delaying tasks that are important for our growth and success. This wall is often constructed from a fear of failure, perfectionism, or simply a lack of motivation.

Breaking Down the Wall:

1. Set Clear Goals: Define what you want to achieve and set specific, measurable goals. (I mentioned the S.M.A.R.T. anagram in the last blog.)
2. Create a Schedule: Plan your tasks and allocate time for each. Stick to this schedule as much as possible. I usually add my tasks as if it is a client appointment, devoting valuable time to the “appointment.”
3. Eliminate Distractions: Identify what distracts you and take steps to minimize these distractions. This might mean turning off notifications, creating a dedicated workspace, or setting specific times for breaks. I set my phone on “Do Not Disturb” to minimize distractions. There are all types of distractions, from children and pets to unannounced visits from friends and family. This is a great way to teach boundaries to those types of “distractions.
   

The Wall of Perfectionism

Perfectionism is the pursuit of flawless-ness, which can create a high and often unrealistic standard. This wall prevents us from taking action because we are afraid of making mistakes or not meeting our own high expectations. Perfectionism is a learned behavior which can result in one being “hard” on themselves.

Breaking Down the Wall:

1. Accept Imperfection: Understand that perfection is an illusion. Mistakes and imperfections are part of the learning process.
2. Focus on Progress: Instead of striving for perfection, aim for progress. Celebrate the improvements and milestones along the way.
3. Set Realistic Standards: Establish achievable goals and standards for yourself. Recognize that doing your best is often more than enough.
   

The Wall of “Comfort Zones”

“Comfort Zones” or “Happy Places” are the psychological states where we feel safe and at ease. While staying within these zones may feel comfortable, it often prevents us from taking risks and exploring new opportunities that lead to growth and success.

Breaking Down the Wall:

1. Embrace Discomfort: Recognize that discomfort is a sign of growth. Push yourself to step outside of your comfort zone regularly.
2. Take Calculated Risks: Evaluate the risks and benefits of new opportunities. Start with small risks and gradually take on bigger challenges.
3. Seek New Experiences: Engage in activities that challenge you. This could be learning a new skill, traveling, or taking on a new project at work.
   
   The Wall of External Opinions
   Often, we allow the opinions and judgments of others to build walls around us. We fear criticism, rejection, or not meeting others' expectations, which can prevent us from pursuing our true passions and goals.

Breaking Down the Wall:

1. Prioritize Self-Approval: Focus on your own values, goals, and happiness rather than seeking approval from others.
2. Surround Yourself with Supportive People: Build a network of individuals who support and encourage your growth.
3. Develop Resilience: Stop fighting it! Learn to accept constructive criticism and ignore negative judgments that do not contribute to your growth.
   
   

Conclusion

There are many more walls that we can build. Many walls can prevent us from achieving the success we desire. By recognizing and addressing these barriers, we can dismantle them, brick by brick, and use those bricks to build pathways to our full potential.

Remember, success is not just about reaching a destination; it’s about overcoming the challenges along the way. Start today by breaking down your walls and stepping into the success you deserve.